Monday, April 25, 2011
No one.
When my 姑婆(my father's aunt, also called her 妈妈) asked me why did I look so gloomy these few days and asked me to say it out so that I can feel better, I could not utter a word.Life was never happy for me from the beginning.
I'd rather have no family and friends so I could do whatever I like, and I do not have to care about what other people feel.
I feel like moving out.
I need to have a lot of money to make this happen.
I want to live my life as an adult. Properly.
妈妈 feels a lot like my mother than my real mother was.
She asked me to talk to other close friends if I have a problem and keep it inside me.
She said it would be very 辛苦 for me.
But who can I talk to? It's not like I can find any 阿猫阿狗 to talk to.
Close friends are just in name. True friends are hard to find.
Facade, all facade.
maybe 笨蛋？I don't dare to bother him. He's setting up a family soon, so how can I disturb him by telling him my sorrows?
It's ok, I'll be fine. Finding more reasons to carry on with life rather than all these regrets.
Get it over and done with.
杀无赦。
Sunday, April 24, 2011
對不起。
Now I realised why Sihao don't want to tell me further when I asked him what kind of person I am and how can I improve myself. He wants me to find it out myself.
对不起，我不应该管太多。
My only goal is to do things that I really want to do.
My world now consists of only: me, myself and I.
No one else.
总有一天你会明白。
Sunday, April 17, 2011
回憶。
It was really a different experience reading all my previous blog posts.It certainly shows that I am in the process of growing up and thinking more maturely now.
But am I grown up yet? I don't know.
But I know that my character hasn't changed: the emo me.